The family way (From Dudley News)

The family way

7:00am Saturday 4th July 2009

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Lisa Salmon looks at the weird, wonderful and sometimes weary world of parenting.

News for parents :: Fathers are treated with distrust and are even regarded with suspicion by 'mumsy' child services, it has been claimed.

A poll commissioned by the Fatherhood Institute found some fathers felt they were treated with distrust or were not properly acknowledged.

The study of 500 dads revealed that 28% felt they were regarded with suspicion or not taken seriously as a parent despite the fact that almost all (96%) had taken their children to medical appointments and 93% had attended school events such as a sports day or parent's evening.

Over two-thirds (67%) of fathers said they thought information provided by healthcare and education services for parents was more geared towards mothers than fathers, and 46% believed those services addressed their partner rather than them.

But as dads get more and more involved with bringing up their kids, surely things will change?

:: More than a third of teenagers admit to using caffeine tablets or energy drinks to help them study, new research has found.

A study by the School Food Trust discovered that students revising for exams skip meals, do less exercise and indulge in more junk food.

The poll, of 500 13-to-17-year-olds, reveals Britain's teenagers often underestimate the importance of healthy living while studying for GCSEs and A-levels.

It found that only 48% thought that eating properly was important to help them revise, with less than one in five feeling that exercise was important in their study regime.

One in four (26%) used energy drinks, while 11% admitted to using performance enhancers such as caffeine tablets.

Chocolate was the revision food of choice for 42% of those questioned, followed by fizzy drinks and biscuits (33% and 31% respectively).

Some things never change.

:: More children are being admitted to hospital with burns partly because of the huge popularity of hair straighteners, a charity has said.

The number of accidents involving under-fives is down, but in the past 10 years the number getting burned has risen by 50%, the Child Accident Prevention Trust (CAPT) said.

According to NHS statistics, in 1997-98 233 children under five needed hospital treatment for burns, and in 2006-07 this increased to 358.

Straighteners can reach temperatures of up to 220C and remain hot for up to eight minutes after they have been switched off.

A child's skin is much thinner than an adult's, so the burns can cause permanent scarring, the CAPT said.

So mums need to keep those straighteners out of children's reach for a long time after they're switched off.

:: Ballroom dancing is helping to improve behaviour and interest more children in exercise, research has found.

An evaluation of a national dancing initiative backed by Strictly Come Dancing professionals Darren Bennett and Lilia Kopylova found that children's attitudes to exercise changed as a result of introducing dance to PE lessons.

The scheme, called Essentially Dance, aimed to improve children's health and fitness, build their confidence and improve their relationship skills.

It saw more than 2,500 students aged five to 18 learn to cha-cha-cha, waltz and jive in 29 primary and secondary schools across England.

The Roehampton University evaluation found that shy children's self-esteem was boosted, and they made friends as a result of the classes.

Less sporty children became more interested in PE, and children's behaviour improved.

Eight in 10 said they found dancing "exciting, cool and brilliant", the study found.

Ask the expert Q: "My marriage has broken down, and although we argue a lot we've decided to stay together for the sake of our children, who are eight and 12. Are we doing what's best for them?"

A: Kelly Musick, is an associate professor at Cornell University, New York State, and co-author of the recently-published study Are Both Parents Always Better Than One?, which tracked children from the age of four to 34 years.

She says: "It's hard to say what's best for any individual child.

"We used survey data to examine links between children's family lives in adolescence and their health and well-being years later.

"We found that kids who lived with both their biological parents tended to do better as young adults - but not if their parents frequently argued.

"Compared to children whose parents got along, children whose parents frequently argued were more likely to binge-drink, smoke, underachieve in school and start their own families at a young age.

"They compared about the same as young adults who grew up with a single parent or step-parent.

"The results of our study are based on typical experiences, but not every child reacts in the same way to parental conflict or separation. Moreover, the effect of parents' conflict on children may depend on how that conflict is managed - for example, how often parents argue in front of kids, or how parents resolve their fights.

"These may be important for children's well-being, yet we were not able to include them in our study.

"Marriage is not a blanket prescription."

Website of the week: www.cookingwithschools.com The website of the Flora Cooking With Schools initiative promotes healthy eating, and is encouraging parents to collect tokens from special Flora packs which can be exchanged for thousands of pounds worth of cooking equipment for primary schools.

Information about the scheme, and learning resources, are available on the website. Registered schools can also create personalised campaign material which can be used to encourage parents and staff to collect tokens.

Three ways to... deal with a child's annoying bad habits 1. Ignore the behaviour as much as possible, especially if it isn't disruptive, and offer lots of praise and attention when he isn't doing it.

2. Give simple reminders to help him know when he's doing it, like a special hand signal or a tap on the shoulder.

3. Offer a substitute, like a squeeze ball, or encourage him to make a fist, and give an incentive for stopping, like a star chart.

Reader tip :: Make sure you write down every milestone your child achieves - first words, when she took her first steps, her first food etc. If you don't, you simply won't remember it all, and then it's gone forever.

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